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Raising Her Profile - to the Next Level

Posted by Leticia, 14 Apr

If you’ve ever looked at your profile and felt like something might be missing, this story is for you.

Karen had just joined our site.  Providing the basic information was no problem, but when she faced the “Who Am I?” portion of her new dating profile, Karen felt what many singles do—paralysis.

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“I know who I am, but how do I convey my personality through my profile?” she wondered.  What were the qualities the right person would appreciate about her, and how could she illustrate them in an appealing way?  What exactly was she looking for in a relationship, and what were the traits her mate had to have?

Karen struggled to come up with enough of an answer to meet the requirement for an essay’s minimum length.  “I knew that if I wanted my profile approved, I’d better write something,” she laughs.  But what to write, and how to write it?

Our Profile Review Service gave Karen the insights she was after.  A special benefit for subscribers, the Review provides personal attention from a Success Specialist who knows nearly everything there is to know about dating profiles.  During a live chat session, you receive a thorough review of your profile and personalized advice on how to get better responses—from the right people.

“I figured that they know what a ‘great’ profile looks like,” Karen says, explaining her decision to schedule a Profile Review.  “So why not get some expert advice?”

Karen’s consultant, Jackie, gave her a bunch of personalized profile-writing pointers.  One tip was to write your profile as if you’re talking to your date over a cup of coffee.  A casual, conversational voice is not only more fun to read, it gives the reader a better feel for who you are and how you talk.  “She said to think about the kind of things I would tell someone about myself,” Karen remembers.  “She also read through my profile, line by line, and gave direct feedback on it.”

To punctuate the flashes of humor in Karen’s writing, Jackie suggested that Karen throw in an “LOL” or two.  She also mentioned that it was important to be smiling in your profile photos, as this creates a friendly and approachable vibe.  Karen was in good shape there—she had a nice smile in every shot.  Finally, Jackie explained how specific tweaks would help Karen’s essay garner more responses from the people she hoped to hear from.

“I took Jackie’s advice and made the suggested adjustments,” Karen says.  “I have received more contact from men, more views, and have started communicating with more people.  The Live Chat Service served as an incredible perk and has really enhanced my online dating experience.  Thanks, Jackie!”

* To maintain member's privacy, photo used above is a stock photo

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51 responses to "Raising Her Profile - to the Next Level"

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  1.   Chrome_angel says:
    Posted: 23 Apr 19

    I would just like to stand out more and not b seen as timid as im a shy introvert already

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  2.   fortress07 says:
    Posted: 15 Apr 17

    Nothing wrong with most profile writing..sure we got serious guys here and we got the jokers, the fake and the real guy.... Its everywhere not just on this site but I've come to realize we turn down the serious ones and go for the other..maybe u don't find his profile interesting,,maybe distance,maybe race,maybe age,,maybe u had a bad experience with another man whose from same country or place with him..well,,real love has got nothing to do with age,nor race nor distance,,its all about sacrifice,,commitment and trust..we got serious guys here would careless about u profile writeups,,abt u age,race nor distance..we just want to love and be loved too.

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  3.   framsy says:
    Posted: 16 Aug 13

    Hi everyone,really need profile help too.Theres something seriously wrong with it.I do get views but hardly do they respond with flirts or emails.Most probably its what i wrote i wrote in my profile that turns them off:-( please help,thank you

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  4.   Debrando says:
    Posted: 16 Jul 13

    Grest job. Stay bless

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  5.   statician says:
    Posted: 27 Jun 13

    I have been on this site for two years but not getting a serious right man for me.May be because of my profile can any one help me so as i make a better profile i feel like closing my account.

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    • 3ox says:
      Posted: 18 Jul 13

      Just ask yourself what are my qualities,your likes and this like.And what exactly are you looking for in a person.We all have a requirement right,then what are yours.

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  6.   StealMyHeart says:
    Posted: 26 Jun 13

    I'm sure my profile is in need of a rewrite lol. But most of the men on here could careless what your profile is saying. Because they're only interested in the pictures you have posted.

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  7.   starhippy says:
    Posted: 09 Jun 13

    I honestly need a profile help.I have written so little about myself and I don't think it makes sense.I have realised that the only people who view me are those that I have viewed or those that I favourite.Kindly help me do a good profile.

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  8.   prettygirl46 says:
    Posted: 05 Jun 13

    I changed my photo hoping to get more responses and it has worked. I wanted to make myself more attractive and I wanted people to see me before and after. Another tip is changing up your photos, getting a new hairstyle or just a total makeover. Putting up new photos helps.

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  9.   prettygirl46 says:
    Posted: 19 Apr 13

    When I first joined I didn't have a photo and some guys were pressuring me and I compared myself to a celebrity because I didn't know how to describe myself. I was getting viewed but hardly any messages about my profile. I updated my profile a couple of times and I made a few friends. I actually put an older photo with the weight that I gained(my headshot), then the second photo was the after photo and I got more responses. That one was a full body picture. One guy commented on the fact that I should be proud of my weight loss goals and trying to be a healthier person. So I appreciated that. I tried to keep it simple in the beginning and then I thought it wasn't enough. You can also write about what you like and don't like. I usually can tell if someone is genuine or not. When someone says, "I noticed in your profile that you like music," I am suprised and thank them for noticing. I don't like to say anything too revealing about myself. For example, if someone says they like to make love when its pouring rain outside, I would rephrase it and say, I love the way the rain makes me feel. This way they will ask you.

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  10.   4badriya says:
    Posted: 23 Oct 11

    Truly speaking I need the profile help because most of the time I find it hard to describe myself and also the man of my dream (Think can't be helped right) I just had to write a small stuff for my profile to be approved but again am not getting any response or am I that desperate lol. Or maybe my price charming is not yet born (Thats how my mom put it crazy huh) Anyway I need help everyone

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  11.   ciaobella says:
    Posted: 18 Oct 11

    I understand Hotrod 2009 completely. I had women who are successful at online dating (at least 2 dates a week) review my profile, and tell me nothing is wrong with it and it conveys my personality completely (good or bad?). I even had a male review it, and he said that my profile sounded like I was a great person, but just not his type. At this point I feel I am nobodies type. I have been proactive and winked and wrote to a couple of men, but nothing has come out of it. I need help understanding why my profile is unsuccessful in capturing the right man?

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  12.   seekingdom says:
    Posted: 13 Oct 11

    Dear Lokita, If you can't find a man here, we're all. You're gorgeous!!! God help us all. lol However, please consider checking out The Secret Soulmate, or any of the Law of Attraction books. I swear I'm not in publishing or advertizing, I have a profile on here and I'm seeking someone myself! In fact, there are tons of these books by different authors (but my favorite is Michael Losier) and they have free seminars on youtube so you don't even have to buy any of them. I'm just sharing the info and passing it on because it's worked for me in my travel experiences, having a business, finding an apartment, etc. In the past it helped me to find a really great man from online to have a relationship (a good guy, just not The One for me), and we broke up recently so I'm back again. I wish you all luck, and I really do think this is one of the better sites, esp for interracial dating. There are paying members who are sweet, intellectual, nice guys. Hang in there. Just delete the smiles!

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  13.   seekingdom says:
    Posted: 13 Oct 11

    Dear Hotrod 2009, I noticed that just about all of the people who replied to you wrote that your profile is just fine the way it is. I also noticed that most people who replied to you were women. Unless you're looking to date women, you might want to try to ask a few men for their advice. When I did that, I got some hard, true facts from a close but brutally honest friend. But, I also got quite a few replies from men once I followed his suggestions. So, forgive me for sounding harsh, and feel free to ignore my advice, but I know when I submit my writing to a workshop I'm in, it's rarely the "Wow, I really liked it," that's most helpful. More often it's when people tear my work to shreds (usually in a nice way, lol) that helps me enormously to become successful with the piece I'm struggling with. So; 1st, use spell check. You come across as really intelligent, and classy, from your profile as well as your pic. The word "except" should be spelled "accept" in this sentence. There are several other typos/spelling errors, and a simple click on the button will help you appear as intellectual as you actually are. The other thing you might consider is using the pic on the far right, in the purple sweater as your profile pic. Also, as a more voluptuous woman myself, and someone who has dabbled in photography, I want to give you credit for using several pictures, including body pics, I think men appreciate that, especially men who love thick women, however, always ALWAYS make the photographer take a pic from you slightly above you, NEVER from below as it adds major weight to the person posing. In several of your pics I believe you appear larger than I think you are, and I know it's only because of the angle your photo was shot. The pic of you on the right in purple is a perfect pic because of your smile, the color looks fantastic on you, and you look classy, you look like wifey and that's great. Next time someone takes a few shots of you, try this experiment. Have them shoot once from standing a foot or two above you, once at eye level and once from a foot or two below you, they might be sitting and you're standing. You'll be completely shocked at the results! My final feedback is that your profile sounds great; to women readers. You wrote exactly what we ALL are seeking. Unfortunately, since men looking online to meet someone are like kids in a candy store, so we need to do something to stand out a bit. There's a thin line, but try writing something sexy and flirty but not anything graphic or sexual, just a hint of something. Like, I might throw in that I love wearing high heels and jeans but I wouldn't mention having an expensive lingerie collection lol. I noticed that you wrote quite a long list of things you're seeking in a man, but I didn't see too much (anything?) about what YOU bring to the table. Are you a great cook? Do you love your career? Sports? Animals? Children? Maybe put in some exciting hobbies that your partner and you can do together, and I don't mean going to see the latest chick flick, lol. But, keep it short because many people checking out profiles on a dating site don't really want to read extensive profiles, and when they do, they don't want to read yet ANOTHER boring profile where someone writes about loving "long walks on the beach, candlelit dinners, someone who knows what s/he wants..." blah blah blah. And NO ONE is seeking someone who likes drama, even those who do but don't realize it, so don't waste time including that in your profile. Focus on the positive. Whenever I read a profile that says "NO DRAMA!" I automatically think, uh oh...this person has been attracting drama in their lives. I wonder what kind of drama THEY'RE bringing. Keep it positive. And finally, there's a book called The Secret Soulmate, and it uses the principles of The Law of Attraction based on focusing on the positive qualities you seek in a partner and drawing them to you. It's a great book, in fact all of the Law of Attraction books are fantastic. Good luck!

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  14.   Lokita says:
    Posted: 04 Jul 11

    Although I have not had a profile review. I don't know what else I can do to improve my profile. I'm beginning to think that a lot of the members here are not that serious. A lot of the males are non-paying members that shows the lack of interest. I'm open to any suggestions regarding my profile. Good luckily to you guys

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  15.   chriso72 says:
    Posted: 04 Jun 11

    I don't think a profile makeover will make one get the kind of partner they desire, i have had my profile here for 3 years (these are lifetime decisions) and still hope one day it will work out. I have been through quite a number of profiles and most people just describe want they are and what they want; (getting real).

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  16.   lene2000 says:
    Posted: 01 May 11

    i really need a profile makeover , becos am not getting the type of men am interested to and i dont know why am having problem in subscribing , pls i really need help in getting my profile back to normal .

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  17.   kemille09 says:
    Posted: 30 Apr 11

    ..i believe ..i can find my soul mate ..but u cannot force 2 come..bcoz love u can do wait when he comes...no matter wat happen i can still wait...:) hope i can find here !!!!

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  18.   manneh44 says:
    Posted: 29 Apr 11

    I keep on waiting someone serious but until now I do not meet such man to be serious. i do not know what i am going to do can wait to have want i will call my own.

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  19.   bagazo11 says:
    Posted: 28 Apr 11

    I know my profile may be too direct and upset a few? How do i put into words the qualities I'm looking for to be in a LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP,without being too harsh?

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  20.   EarthAngel3 says:
    Posted: 28 Apr 11

    For this to be a serious site, there is a certainly a number of goofs; that is why I think we serious women are not meeting our suitable men. Too many ppl (both men and women) just want to play; makes it tough for real women like me.

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    • trinity2011 says:
      Posted: 28 Apr 11

      i really disagree with you earthangel, for sure men are serious its you women who are leting us down. u need to change you attitude.

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  21.   perfecto says:
    Posted: 27 Apr 11

    I know m yprofile was hard for me to get the information on me out the reason why this is new for me But inperson with different women if hard because you dont' know if they are single or married . and you don't know if the the woman is play games.Get on a date site is hard for the first time Like I was said this is mine first time .but I think all women.are beutiful with love from their intersoul and feeling.

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  22.   eq says:
    Posted: 23 Apr 11

    I know my profile MAY BE TOO DIRECT & UPSET A FEW?! How do I put into words the qualities I'm looking for to be in a LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP, withot being too harsh?

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    • XnChristine says:
      Posted: 10 Mar 13

      Since you asked: The steps of meeting you list sound regimented and a little intimidating. How about, "Write to me--don't be shy." It just needs to be softened and more casual. You can also soften your description of what you're looking for it by taking out all of the negatives: the "no pets, no contacts, etc." The pets you can discuss later. If a woman does all of that work on her appearance, it means she's trying. Instead, why not stick to positives and say what you DO want, like someone who's cbeautiful on the inside and will love you. Tell her how kind you will be to her. Hope this helps. (Now I have to get help for my own profile!)

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  23.   simonamadi says:
    Posted: 23 Apr 11

    dose it mean that it is only men that most contact a woman, you may contact them but to get a real one and a serious one is very hard. please if you kn that you are here for a right reason seeking for real love don't be shy to contact me i'm loving all the time. i want girls to read from me and get back to me

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  24.   dollbaby53 says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 11

    DO YOU THINK MY PROFILE NEED A PROFILE MAKE OVER, BECAUSEI DO 3 MONTH MEMBERSHIP ALREADY AND I STARTED 1 MONT AGAIN HELP

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  25.   Keekee2010 says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 11

    I dont understand why I am havin a hard time meetin someone who can like me for me and my four kids

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  26.   zeny says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 11

    I keep on waiting someone serious but until now I dont meet such man to be serious. i dont know what im going to do.

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  27.   whinter says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 11

    I am new to the site and like everyone else who has replied; I am not getting the responses that I would like nor am I getting responses for the type of men I am attracted to or interested in meeting. I feel that I am some how misrepresenting myself. I do not want to write so much that it would not be read or taken seriously. Cheers, Whinter

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    • jwest50 says:
      Posted: 24 Apr 11

      I THINK YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN JUST BE REAL AND TO OTHER PEOPLES YOU WILL GAIN THEIR ATTENTION FRO JIMMIE WEST JACKSONVILLE FLA

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  28.   Cucklebug says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 11

    Wow, where to start. I am a student and a bit uptight in real life, so my profiles reflect that. I need so find a way to become "less booky" and stiff. My personality is locked up in my words and I get less hits than a no armed batter. Please help me.

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  29.   graciea says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 11

    I find it had to explain who i am not what i want from someone because i fell like am flossing or am proud and that limits me to explaining myself well,i have not met anyone even for a hello,i want a major help!

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  30.   BerryBmore says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 11

    I just had my profile reviewed by Jackie and she really helped me understand, her suggestions to make the phrasing flow with the direction of my content made my desires pop. In addition, my lack of photos was a determent (going to upload more) overall great suggestions, some I could do immediately, the pix will take a minute. Overall, I can see my success story posted thanks to Jackie's suggestions.

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  31.   swty69 says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 11

    My profile is on drip ,please help before it collapses,,i was wondering why i wasn't receiving any responses,,especially what am looking for and what am. HELP,HELP.

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    • Pink_Peony says:
      Posted: 30 May 13

      I say try changing your pictures.. Smile more cos I have not seen a picture of you smiling or just looking happy to be in your skin.. I would go with I white shirt.. ' my take' .. Good luck..

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  32.   bttrflykss77 says:
    Posted: 21 Apr 11

    i'm new to all this and i think my profile needs a make-over. i don't seem to be getting the type of responses that i'm looking for

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  33.   chrisdb40 says:
    Posted: 19 Apr 11

    well hotrod...I just looked at your profile and if you were closer I would have messaged you bye now...were both the sameage and your a pretty woman....pretty much what I look for here.... chris

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    • tricia66 says:
      Posted: 20 Apr 11

      i really need a profile makeover I did a profile review and it still has not helped, most of the guys are real creeps or married. I want my profile and picture to bring out the best in me so I can get the guys to open up more it is really starting to discourage me. So if anyone have any suggestions "HELP" I need to know what I am doing wrong. TRICIA66

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      • brn0eyed0grl says:
        Posted: 22 Apr 11

        tricia66, I hope my assessment of your profile will be helpful. There are two things I would change. 1. You mention that you are recently single. I think that some men might read into this that you might come with recent wounds or some lingering drama. 2. You list your occupation as "student"...under the "personality" category, when it says "when it comes to work" you wrote, "find out later." I'm wondering of some men might think that you might be a single mom that migh need a little financial help. Other than those two things, I think it's a good profile. Your picture is great!

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      • Kathumm says:
        Posted: 11 Aug 12

        I haven't been on the site long, but I looked at your profile and it is fine. As a new member it is easy to get discouraged cause lets face it, there are people in here who have joined for that anonymous thrill of a secret booty call or to show off themselves. I try to keep positive because I know that one day someone who takes this sight seriously will find me or I will find him.

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    • brn0eyed0grl says:
      Posted: 22 Apr 11

      chrisdb40, I found no flaws with your profile. It got my attention. You're just so far away. :-( Hang in there!

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  34.   chrisdb40 says:
    Posted: 19 Apr 11

    My profile needs help!!!!! The reason I say this is cause I tend to write to much and I feel like a woman reading it might get bored and move on something else...Also I am located in the middle of the state of texas and seems like so many ladies here in texas are from those big cities so I need something to catch there eye so I can get more conversations started with them....Once I get a conversation going with a woman...my odds of meeting her increase greatly....HELP ME PLEASE!!!!! Chris

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  35.   iceburger says:
    Posted: 18 Apr 11

    Hotrod2009, am no expert too, and would take everything you have said in your profile seriously. But thats what every lady wants. And the "every lady' thing may be a tag of a not so great lady. Some of them are jokers too...juts like men you get. Others are married, just like men you get. Online dating to me is like lottery...you either win or lose. But you have to be positive and keep playing with hope of winning.

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    • hotrod2009 says:
      Posted: 22 Oct 11

      Thanks iceburger unfortunately what you have said is true. I'll just keep playing the lottery with hopes of winning.

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  36.   blaque34 says:
    Posted: 17 Apr 11

    @ hotrod2009 I'm no expert but I checked your profile and you seem to be pretty straightforward about what you are looking for. I also have to agree that seeking that potential mate is very frustrating! I think that two people have to be open to actually taking the time to meet that person (which you already got that part covered)! But no matter how much we update our profiles that person that is actually serious about meeting someone and(share similar interest) as you do will find you!!!! (God Bless)

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  37.   hotrod2009 says:
    Posted: 16 Apr 11

    I believe that my profile needs help because I'm not getting the responses that I would like. A lot of the responses that I do receive are from men that don't seem to be serious about having a (real) relationship or believe it or not they are married. Which makes this very frustrating, after all that is what (I hope) that most people are looking for.

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    • brn0eyed0grl says:
      Posted: 22 Apr 11

      hotrod2009, I'm on board with the other comments. Your profile is just fine. It sounds genuine and you seem like a very likable person for someone to want to know more about... Hang in there. This online stuff is tough!

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Submitted by: Karen, USA, 34

My Dating Coach really took the time to go through my profile thoroughly. First she viewed my pictures and gave me great feedback.

She read through the written portion of my profile, line by line, and gave direct feedback on how to add my personality to it.

My amazing consultant, even asked how my contacts where going and offered a few suggestions to increase my interactions with new men.

I took her advice and made the suggested adjustments.

I have received more contact from men, more views, and have started communicating with more people which was the whole point of joining the site in the first place.

The Coaching Service served as an incredible perk and has really enhanced my online dating experience. Thanks!

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