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No means NO...unless, it means HELL NO!

Posted by Leticia, 20 Dec

There has been an increase in the number of reported date rapes across the country. The problem has become so bad that there is even a drug named the "date rape drug" that is used to make the process easier for the perpetrator to take control over his victims. What are the signs to look for? How do you protect yourself from becoming another statistic?

Knowing how to protect yourself; from someone who won't take NO for an answer.

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Whether you know it or not someone you know has been a victim of rape. More recently we've been hearing about "date rape". It's more than being assaulted by someone you know. It's not only happening on college campuses it's happening at private parties, clubs on cruise ships. It's happening by people you know and folks you've never met. I say folks because although men are by far in the majority when it comes to being perpetrators, there have been men that have fallen victim to date rape drugs too.

The drugs that are used to assist in the rape are very effective for several reasons. They are virtually undetectable; you can't taste it, see it or smell it. Not only that, they leave the body within 72 hours. They can be easily put into food or drinks and will make its victim unable to say no or defend themselves. Even worse, you may wake up with no memory of the sexual activity at all.

So, how do you protect yourself against something you can't see, smell or taste? The biggest thing would be in how you carry yourself. Remember a few simple rules whenever you go out alone or with someone that you haven't established trust with:

  1. Don't accept open drinks from strangers.

  2. When in bars or clubs always get your drink directly from the bartender

  3. Never leave your drink unattended or turn your back on your table.

  4. Do not drink from open beverage sources like punch bowls, or pitchers.

  5. Keep your eyes and ears open; if there is talk of date rape drugs or if you see behavior that makes you uncomfortable...leave!

The best form of protection is awareness. Know where you are and who you are with. Have back up in case you have a momentary lapse in judgment. Take a friend that's got your back. Communication is vital in staying safe. Let someone know where you are and when you should return. The biggest tip would be to follow your gut. You have that sixth sense, don't be afraid to use it and most importantly, don't ignore it. And if you feel like you've been a victim of date rape, timing is everything. Seek professional assistance as soon as possible.

This is Leticia, and no matter how big or small we all need protection from something...sometimes it's ourselves!

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Responses to "No means NO...unless, it means HELL NO!"

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  1.   Pleasjure13 says:
    Posted: 09 Feb 07

    It is difficult to trust anyone these days.

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  2.   ebonybeautyj says:
    Posted: 31 Jan 07

    Give it time and watch behavior closely

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  3.   gms77 says:
    Posted: 13 Jan 07

    It can help to do a background check ie assult history??

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  4.   Fala says:
    Posted: 12 Jan 07

    Women who go out drinking should always take a good buddy with them - someone you know will make sure you get home safe and sound no matter what happens.

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  5.   romeoluvs says:
    Posted: 08 Jan 07

    Girls ofcourse can harm the rapist.. Cut off their d * c * s..

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  6.   lizzy2005 says:
    Posted: 07 Jan 07

    I think the member who says it happened to them is a very brave person indeed! I hope things are going as well as they can for u. Take care.

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  7.   steve says:
    Posted: 07 Jan 07

    This is really scary, how can mankind be so evil? If it gets worse than nobody will look for a partner anymore and prefer to stay single.... and we do have too many single and too little families already.

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  8.   DaTruth17 says:
    Posted: 05 Jan 07

    A good idea is not to be alone with that person or in a particular setting by yourself. Always have backup with you until you get to know a person very well. If that means that backup will be with you for 3 months than oh well so be it. LADIES PLEASE QUIT ACCEPTING DRINKS FROM STRANGERS!!! IT IS 2007 BECOME A BIT INDEPENDENT AND BUY YOUR OWN DRINK. STOP BEING GHETTO FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!!

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  9.   qtinnephilly says:
    Posted: 05 Jan 07

    Its sad to know that women are most often raped by people they know. I read that its a fact that most women know their attacker.

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  10.   jeff says:
    Posted: 04 Jan 07

    it a great arcticle, i work in the club and have seen some vitims so... poeple should keep an eye on their drinks

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  11.   Prncssdyn says:
    Posted: 04 Jan 07

    As a former victim, whose date came highly recommended by his relative and mine you can't be too careful.

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  12.   Fala says:
    Posted: 04 Jan 07

    Informative and scary at the same time. Makes me want to stay home every Friday night with my dog . . . oh wait, I do that already.

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  13.   texasbest says:
    Posted: 03 Jan 07

    Now thats something to think about.

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  14.   Cocokisses says:
    Posted: 03 Jan 07

    All I can say is that I hope men today can respect a woman's boundaries. If they don't, they will find themselves wallowing in a jail cell!

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  15.   Majesticone says:
    Posted: 03 Jan 07

    Unfortunately the prisions are filled beyond capacity and that is why the laws vary from state to state... if you have no place to put them, what do you do? heres a few ideas: #1 work release program & #2 extremely heavy fines & #3 some jail time & #4 register as a sex offender & #5 loose all priveledges to hold a high paying job like prisioners loose the right to vote & #6 the person who comitted the crime has to get on national news channel and give a public apology and admit to the crime they comitted in detail. work on the sides of roads picking up trash for 6mo - a year.. i got a whole list of what to do for the ones that comit crimes other than murder. personally i think this should apply to all ppl who do not comit murder because if you commit murder, you should either get death or life... no early release at all. but thats another article(wink, wink).

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  16.   turbogirl says:
    Posted: 03 Jan 07

    Heh guys, hope we all managed to escape being druged!!! Best way, stay off drink people buying drinks for you, get your own drinks, and watch over it like a hawk!

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  17.   unme23 says:
    Posted: 03 Jan 07

    you always gonna be careful, no matter what!!!

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  18.   gms77 says:
    Posted: 02 Jan 07

    One must establish and maintain boundries!

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  19.   Vonny says:
    Posted: 02 Jan 07

    YOu should always tell a friend or family member where ur goin and who ur with so just in case something happens they can try to find u

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  20.   msdi65 says:
    Posted: 31 Dec 06

    My views on this topic is that when going out to a club and you going to dance or even going to the rest room. If knowone is going to be at the table when you leave take your drink with you. Never walk back up to your table and start drinking from the same glass god knows what someone could have slipped in it while you where gone. As well as when drinking one should always watch their limits.

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  21.   justknowingu says:
    Posted: 31 Dec 06

    Yes, absolutely!--I agree with cocos statements and marques097 statement as well!!---Happy new years though!!

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  22.   msjanine says:
    Posted: 31 Dec 06

    Great Article, Very informative

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  23.   turbogirl says:
    Posted: 30 Dec 06

    Yeah sick people out there, just be careful. Especially during any night out and drink up.

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  24.   marquez097 says:
    Posted: 29 Dec 06

    I would like to see more severe punishment for sex offenders.

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  25.   Jabali says:
    Posted: 29 Dec 06

    Take care people. It is sick that some people have to resort to such underhand methods to get a woman!

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  26.   Pleasjure13 says:
    Posted: 29 Dec 06

    Better safe than sorry.

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  27.   Coco says:
    Posted: 29 Dec 06

    This is one of those things that we can't stress to our daughters of drinking age too much! My sister and I had it happen to us years ago. We actually saw the guy pour something into our drink! We took off but saw him looking around for us...too bad! Ladies keep on stressing to your sisters/daughters/nieces to be careful and watch those drinks!

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  28.   Natural72 says:
    Posted: 28 Dec 06

    Great article. Also I never make it a habit to go to social gatherings alone and we definately do a head count before we leave.

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  29.   gotgame says:
    Posted: 28 Dec 06

    way too many weirdos out there now y'all!! ladies always have your man watch your drink even if it's water. never go to the bathroom at the same time as your man does cuz u both could get your drinks tainted

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  30.   gms77 says:
    Posted: 27 Dec 06

    Thanks for taking the time to educate us all on an important topic!

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  31.   gms77 says:
    Posted: 27 Dec 06

    Thanks for taking the time to educate us all on an important topic!

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  32.   nicefella115 says:
    Posted: 27 Dec 06

    respect the women fellows!!!!!!!!

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  33.   Majesticone says:
    Posted: 27 Dec 06

    I learnd not to accept drinks from people and i learned not to leave my drink and step away from it. unfortunately...there are aslo bar tenders who assist in spreading this drug around. rare but it happens in fact, i dont drink at all. i prefer to be sober when i go out and mind the company i keep..

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  34.   lizzy2005 says:
    Posted: 26 Dec 06

    Ladies keep safe!

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  35.   Pleasjure13 says:
    Posted: 26 Dec 06

    The world isn't getting any safer.

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  36.   sweetest1 says:
    Posted: 26 Dec 06

    Scary but very true.... there are some crazy men and women out there and you must be careful and watch your back!!!

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  37.   gms77 says:
    Posted: 26 Dec 06

    Good advice-THANKS!

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  38.   mossimo36 says:
    Posted: 25 Dec 06

    Some real pervs out there...sad to hear.

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  39.   marquez097 says:
    Posted: 25 Dec 06

    This is a serious issue and everyone needs to be careful of who they are dealing with.

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  40.   lizzy2005 says:
    Posted: 24 Dec 06

    I live in the Uk and this has been happening for a long time. Ladies always make sure u don't leave drinks unattended when u r out. It has been known for a rapist to slip drugs into drinks and then follow the woman!

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  41.   Candy40dd says:
    Posted: 24 Dec 06

    That's a shame.. I think we all need to be careful Man/Woman... I think these sick bast**d need to call an escort service!!! This I can say back home in the islands, if that were to happen to a young lady. The mans whole family will pay for the crime big time.. No means No, F**k the law, we get revenge!!

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  42.   charlee1 says:
    Posted: 23 Dec 06

    this subject is one that women everywhere should take notice of. keep safe, be alert and protect yourselves from danger. great article

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  43.   mary says:
    Posted: 23 Dec 06

    yes this article is soo true,females really need to watch their drinks an sometimes even their food.this happened to my daughter an my sister one time.you have to be so careful

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  44.   Pleasjure13 says:
    Posted: 23 Dec 06

    get to know the person first.

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